Posts archive for: 8 July, 2008
  • Day 4 Part Deux

    Well after that lovely peanut bar my day has gone simply swimmingly.  I feel really upbeat and full of beans.  The headaches, grumpiness and general body grumbles seen to have gone. 

    Could I have reached the top of my wall?  (LL mumbo-gumbo to keep you going through the shitness).  Am I pearched at the top laughing at the people climbing up?  Well, I don't know.  I feel pretty good though.

    I whipped up a little banana mousse for much lunch, which was also wonderful. 

    I'm tell you, I better have lost a whole load of weight when I get weighed tomorrow!

    It's funny how you can go from feeling bloody awful one day to great the next.  Maybe my mum was right about the four hourly eating thing.  I don't think I will eat my 'dinner' (veggie soup) at 4pm though as (a) I think I will be too busy to plonk down with a bowl of soup at work (c) everyone would look at me and ask me what I was doing (c) I wouldn't enjoy it fully because I would be too busy working and (d) I'm so used to walking through the door and eating something that I don't think I could cope if I didn't.  Besides, it's just weird to eat your dinner at work if you work in an office doing the 9-5.

    Something else that is bugging me is the whole 'eating vanilla mousse while watching Eastenders' thing.  Am I really changing my eating habits if I'm still eating nice food while watching TV?  Isn't the whole point of it to change your habits?  Is it okay to do? 

    Oh, I don't know.  Maybe I just have to wait and see what counselling we get.  Perhaps that is the key to everything.  I feel quite sorry for people in their first week of LL because it is damn hard and you do spend time wondering if you're doing things right and if it's meant to be as hard as it is.  You get a lot of questions.  I did get given my counsellor's mobile number though, so I suppose if I was in a jam I could ring her.

    People at work are intrigued as to what I'm doing.  I don't understand how watching me whisk a shake is so fascinating.  Maybe a very large person attempting to lose weight is an entertaining spectacle to the skinnies.  To be fair I have been known to eat four Kit Kats in one day so they're probably just curious about how I am going to live on a shake and a mousse without dying or ripping their heads off (oh dear lord, I nearly did yesterday).

    Anyway, onwards and upwards!  Tomorrow is LL day so I will fill you in on what I've lost and what the group is like (and any more mumbo-gumbo I learn). 

    I'm telling you know, I better lose at least 7lbs!

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  • Day 4

    Just a quick one to say:

    Yesterday was the worst day ever!  By about 5 o' clock I was ready the quit the programme.  It was my first day at work on LL and I was walking around all day in the terrible mood, ready to jump down anyone's throat. I  was peeing every half hour and I still wasn't drinking enough.  All I could think about was cheese:  cheese sandwich, cheese on toast, cheese and onion pastie, macaroni and cheese.  I was cross because I was feeling more obsessed with food than I ever was before.

    I got home and told my mum 'I'm fed up already.  Grumble, grumble, grumble' and she tried to motivate me by saying I looked like I had lost weight and then she made me a thai chilli soup with half a savoury drink sachet in and it was actually really nice.  I felt better afterwards.  Then we both made a mousse out of a vanilla shake and watched Eastenders.  I felt lots better after that!

    So this morning I am sat eating a peanut bar from my breakfast.  I have never been so excited about being able to eat a bar before in my life.  It's actually quite good.  It's nice to eat something in the morning.  I didn't eat (haha, 'eat' what a joke) until 12 yesterday and I think that's why I was in a bad mood.  My mum reckons I should eat every 4 hours. 

    My boss won't let me leave early to get to LL so I might have to switch groups or days or something.  I'm not sure what is happening yet but I am definitely going to my normal group on Wednesday.  After that, who knows.  That was another reason I was really cheesed (no pun intended) off yesterday.  It was all a big kaffufle.

    Anyway, I best get on!  Just wanted to update you on the shiteous situation.  Hopefully today will be better.

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